Forever and a Day
by Carrie Underwood Fan
Summary: Fifteen years ago, Meredith Grey left Seattle never looking back, not knowing she was taking something of Derek's with her. Now she's back along with her daughter, with alot of explaining to do.
1. Chapter 1

_**Alright I'm very well aware that I have two other stories that I should be updating, (and summer assignments that need to be edited) but if I do not get this out onto paper, I will either pull my hair out or scream! So this story has been lingering in my head for months. Now, similar circumstances as my other story One Step at a Time, but in a way very different. Depending on reaction from you guys, will determine on me continuing the story. This happens directly after the season five finale and George died. I don't want to spoil too much, so read it to find out! Happy reading!**_

Meredith watched as her daughter sat flipping through the latest issue of _Seventeen, _as they waited for their flight out to Seattle. Her fifteen year old daughter Meaghan had barely said anything since they arrived at the airport earlier this morning.

"Hey Megs you want to get something from Starbucks? We still have some time before we take off." asked Meredith as she leaned her chin against Meaghan's shoulder to glimpse at the magazine.

Meaghan gently shrugged her mother away and shook her head, before focusing back on her magazine. She grabbed her iPod and stuck the earphones into her ear. Her hand then reached to the device, turning up the volume.

Meredith sighed as she reached over and pulled the earphones from her daughter's ears and pulled the magazine down. "Okay listen, I can't sit silently for the next four hours on an airplane, while you give me the silent treatment. I get that your upset at me, but please don't ignore me." pleaded Meredith.

"Mom I'm not mad at you. I just don't feel like talking." said Meaghan as she turned her gaze away from her mother's.

"You don't feel like talking? Miss Chatterbox herself?" asked as she put her hand over her mouth in mock astonishment. Meaghan laughed slightly at that. "Hey I got you to laugh." said Meredith with a smile.

"You got me to laugh." stated Meaghan with a smile as she leaned her head against her mother's shoulder.

"I know this isn't the best situation, us moving to Seattle. But Richard is offering a job offer I can't refuse. But this is a new experience you've never been to Seattle. And we'll be closer to Uncle Mark, Aunt Lexie, Aunt Cristina, Uncle Alex, Aunt Izzie and …" Meredith rambled off trying to name more good reasons to be leaving.

"My father." said Meaghan, adding to Meredith's list. "He still lives in Seattle right?" asked Meaghan with a questioning glance.

"As far as I know yes." said Meredith.

The uneasy feeling she'd been having since Richard called last week, had just intensified thirty times, when Meaghan had brought up Derek. Meaghan didn't know much about Derek at all, come to think if it she didn't even know his name. She just knew that her father lived in Seattle and that he was a doctor. Meredith had been as vague as possible, when she explained all this to Meaghan when she was younger.

"I don't want to meet him." said Meagan from her place on Meredith's shoulder. "I just don't."

"You don't have too." said Meredith as she gently rubbed Meaghan's shoulder. It constantly ran through her head, would she run into Derek a lot in the hospital? She was a neuro attending and he was the head. Maybe she wouldn't seem him that often. It was a big hospital

"_Flight 247 from Boston to Seattle now boarding rows 15 thru 10."_ called a woman's voice over the intercom.

"That's us." said Meredith as both she and Meaghan stood up and collected their belongings. They quickly walked over t the departing gate and stood on the short line, both of them looking longingly out the window.

"Goodbye Boston." said Meghan with slight wave of her hand. "Hello Seattle" she added with a slight grimace.

"It won't be so bad." added Meredith with as reassuring of a smile she could offer. _"I hope." _thought Meredith as she glanced up at the sky slightly. "Please don't let it be bad." whispered Meredith.

_**GAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAG**_

Meredith looked out the window as the cab drove along, looking at the grey Seattle sky. She definitely hadn't missed the rain. She looked out to right, to see that the car was pulling up in front of Mark and Lexie's house.

"We're here." said Meredith as she patted Meaghan's leg, as her daughter looked up from the texting she was doing on her phone.

Meredith stepped out of the car and looked at the Victorian house that sat in front of her. Shortly after Meredith had left, Lexie had agreed to move in with Mark. Around eight months later Lexie had found out she was pregnant with Allie, and about a year after that Mark and Lexie finally got married. Meredith had missed the wedding, due to the fact that Derek of course would be there and she didn't want to chance anything.

"Mom." called Meaghan pulling Meredith out of her daze. "You have to pay the guy remember."

"Of course." said Meredith as she pulled her wallet out of her tote bag and quickly handed the cab driver some money. "Thank you." said Meredith as she and Meaghan both reached for their suitcases they brought with them and headed to the front door. Meredith knocked twice and then rang the doorbell.

"I'm coming!" called Lexie's voice behind the door, and two seconds later both Meredith and Meaghan heard the click of the door and it opened to reveal Lexie. "Meredith!" exclaimed Lexie as she pulled her sister into a hug.

"Lex don't squish me to death." joked Meredith, as Lexie's arms clung to her tightly.

"Sorry." said Lexie with a smile. "Hi sweetheart." said Lexie as she pulled Meaghan into a hug. "What are you guys doing here? I though your flight didn't get in till late tonight?" asked Lexie as she ushered them into the foyer.

"We switched our flight last minute. It was a lot cheaper and it gives us more time to get settled in before tomorrow." said Meredith.

"Wait you're going into the hospital tomorrow?" asked Meaghan as she turned towards her mother.

"I got a call from the Chief after we landed. It turns out he needs me to start sooner then expected." said Meredith. "But you can come with me, take a tour." said Meredith as she brushed Meaghan's bang out of her face.

"Is that the voice of my favorite god-daughter?" asked Mark as he came into the room with a smirk on his face.

"Uncle Mark!" squealed Meaghan as she launched herself into her uncle's arms.

Mark groaned at the impact, and then smiled as he kissed the top of his nieces head. Meredith smiled as she watched Meaghan look happy, for the first time since she had told her they were moving. Meaghan and Mark had an extremely special bond, unlike most godfather/goddaughter relationships. Mark had basically been Meaghan's surrogate father growing up.

"Gee I feel loved." joked Meredith with a smirk. "No warm welcome for your favorite dirty mistress?" asked Meredith.

Mark released his grip on Meaghan and stepped forward and pulled Meredith into a bear hug. "How's my favorite dirty mistress?" asked Mark.

"Fine, thanks for asking." said Meredith with a smile, as she pulled away and stepped back and put her arm around Meaghan's shoulder. "We're tired but fine."

Meaghan rolled her eyes playfully and shrugged her mother off. She turned her head and sniffed the air. "Mhmhm Aunt Lexie what are you making? It smells good."

"Well… actually we're having a few people over for dinner." said Lexie as she twisted her foot into the floor slightly, while looking out of the corner of her eye towards Mark.

"Oh no. I'm sorry guys I didn't mean to just walk in and ruin your plans. I should have called first." said Meredith as she rubbed her temple slightly. "You know what Megs and I will go stay at a hotel for tonight." said Meredith.

"No. No, no. Don't be silly. We were going to pick you guys up from the airport later anyways; just because of a slight change doesn't mean you're going anywhere. You're staying and eating dinner with us." said Lexie forcefully.

"Lexie. No. I don't want to horn in on your plans. I already feel bad that we have to stay here." said Meredith, matching her sister's tone.

"Meredith you're my big sister. You're more than welcome to stay with us, for as long as you need too. And you're staying for dinner. Besides it's not like its friends you don't know. It's just Alex, Izzie, Callie and some hospital people." said Lexie as she and Meredith walked into the kitchen.

"I really appreciate this. And I swear won't get in your way. It's just for a few weeks, until we find a place." rambled Meredith.

"Mom, you're rambling." said Meaghan as she hopped onto the nearest stool by the island.

Mark whistled as he leaned up against the counter. "Geez Grey, she's directing you now too." said Mark with a smirk.

Meredith glared at Meaghan from across the kitchen, as she popped a carrot from the salad bowl into her mouth. "I know and I don't appreciate it, since she herself rambles." said Meredith.

The four of them turned to hear the noise of feet coming down the stairs. "Mom?" called Allie's voice. "Mom, are Aunt Meredith and…" asked Allie answering her own question as she saw her aunt and cousin.

"Allie!" cried Meaghan as she jumped up and ran to hug her cousin, who squeezed her cousin back just as hard.

"I knew I heard your voice." said Allie as they pulled apart. "Come on, I want to show you something." said Allie as she pulled Meaghan back up the stairs with her, both girls giggling all the way.

"Well we won't see them for the rest of the night." joked Mark from where; he was opening the wine bottle on the counter.

"Lexie let me help you with something." said Meredith as she walked over to the stove, where Lexie was stirring some liquid in a pot.

"No!" shouted Lexie quickly, sending Mark into fitful of laughter. "I mean, there's got to be something else that..." started Lexie before she was cut off by the doorbell ringing. "You can get the door!" said Lexie.

Meredith smiled, shaking her head at her sister's behavior as walked back through the foyer to answer the door. Lexie was probably wise though, not letting Meredith help. Although a lot had changed over the years, Meredith cooking skills weren't one of them. She reached for the door handle and opened the door and when she opened it, was surprised to see who stood behind it.

Derek's smile and composure immediately fell, the moment her saw Meredith standing on the opposite side of the door. He refrained himself from dropping the bottle of wine he held in his hands. Somehow all he could muster was;

"Hi."

_**Reviews make my day! =)**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**I cannot express enough how pleased I am with all the feedback I received for the first chapter! I'm so glad you guys liked reading it, as much as I enjoyed writing it! Alright now this will probably be my last update for a little while, due to other writing for school and updating my other stories. I just didn't want to leave you guys hanging! Alright so as usual, Happy Reading!**_

Meredith froze in the spot she was standing in, her mouth becoming dryer and dryer by the second. Even if she wanted to say something back; it would be virtually impossible. Somehow she managed to regain the function of her mouth and mustered a;

"Hi." said Meredith. "Um, come in." said Meredith as she stood off to the side and let Derek enter the foyer. Derek then entered and took his jacket off and hung it on the coat rack. They glanced at each other before they hugged awkwardly.

"How are you?" asked Derek as he and Meredith walked to the kitchen. "How's life?" asked Derek.

"I'm um good. How are you?" asked Meredith as she shot her sister a look as they arrived in the kitchen.

"Hi Derek." said Lexie as she kissed him on the cheek.

Mark walked over from the other side of the kitchen and handed him a scotch, clinking glasses with him. He then handed Meredith a shot of tequila, which she downed immediately.

"Well some things never change." joked Derek with a grin.

Meredith smiled slightly but refrained herself when she realized what she was doing._ "Stop it Meredith! Don't fall for it. Ignore the dreaminess."_ How could she ignore him though? Even older Derek still was "McDreamy" as ever. His hair was still a gorgeous raven color, wild with waves, but a few more grey spots then there once was. His blue eyes, still as mesmerizing as ever. Where did she constantly see those eyes?

The doorbell suddenly rang again, pulling Meredith out of her thoughts, but leaving enough impact to remember what she was trying to think of.

"I'll get!" volunteered Meredith as she quickly walked out of the room and ran to the door. She opened the door to reveal Callie and Arizona both which she quickly said hello too, behind them was Alex, Izzie and their little brood and Cristina and Owen and their son. Meredith quickly ushered the kids and her friends' spouses inside and shut the door.

"What's the matter with you? You look you're about to have a panic attack." said Cristina as she examined her person's face.

"Derek's inside." said Meredith her eyes wide, as the situation finally set in. "He's inside."

"Uh-oh." said Izzie, her eyes widening to what she had just said. "I mean... it's going to be fine." finished Izzie with a fake bright smile.

"How long has he been in there? Have you talked to him?" asked Cristina, eyeing Meredith over trying to read her.

"He made a joke and I smiled, and then I noticed something." said Meredith completely ignoring her friends question and going off on her own little tangent. "I mean what the heck am I going to do?" rambled Meredith.

"Meredith!" screamed Cristina finally breaking her friend's rampage. "You're not making any sense; what are you saying?" asked Cristina.

"Derek's eyes are blue. They're this powerful, gorgeous shade of blue, that are almost one of a kind to any blue eyes I've ever seen." said Meredith.

"So?" asked Cristina, not catching on to what Meredith was saying. "Mere I still don't get what you're saying." said Cristina.

"My daughter, the daughter that Derek doesn't know he has, has the exact same eyes. It's a dead give-away." said Meredith, her voice rising in panic.

"Alright that doesn't necessarily give anything away. I mean genes can be weird; you know that. You can just say she was miraculously blessed with blue eyes." said Izzie.

"Yeah that'll really help the situation." said Cristina. "_We just don't know how she has blue eyes._" mimicked Cristina.

"Alright so maybe that idea was stupid. But you have to go in there." said Izzie as she reached forward and opened the door, shoving Meredith in, as Cristina followed behind.

"Izzie!" whispered Meredith loudly as Izzie continued to push her into the kitchen. She smiled as best as she could as everyone turned to look at her, including Derek.

"Alright, everyone go sit down. Dinner is served." said Lexie as Izzie started to carry in a few plates. She swiftly walked over to the stairs. "Kids! Dinner!" shouted Lexie up the stairs.

Meredith felt the tequila rise in her throat slightly as Lexie called the kids down. Should she pull Meaghan aside and explain? Let it blow over? She listened to the footsteps coming down the stairs, and just hoped that everything wouldn't turn into a disaster.

She walked into the dining room, where conveniently enough all of her friends had taken every seat, except the one next to Derek. She shot everyone at the table a dirty look as she sat down in her seat. Suddenly all the kids bounded into the room, taking their seats.

"Mom, you have to see to what they did to the attic upstairs! It's awesome it's like another floor in itself. And that's where the guest room is." said Meaghan with a grin as she sat down next to Allie, across from Meredith.

Upon hearing the word "Mom" leave Meaghan's mouth, Meredith cringed inwardly. Derek turned and gave her sort of a surprised questioning glance, which she tried to avoid.

"Uhh, Meaghan this is Derek Shepherd. He's the Head of Neuro at Seattle Grace and an old friend. He actually grew up with Uncle Mark." said Meredith, with the best control in her voice she could handle.

"Hi nice to meet you." said Meaghan as she leaned forward and shook Derek's hand. Every pair of eyes was glued to the scene that was slowly unfolding. Meredith eyes nervously darted back and forth, trying to read both of their expressions. Nothing. They were both oblivious to what was happening.

"Alright, go ahead and eat. Don't just sit there." joked Lexie with a smile, as the room suddenly picked up in energy again. Meredith sighed a quick sigh of relief and took a gulp of water from the glass in front of her. She served herself some food, and then slowly began to eat.

"So Meaghan how old are you?" asked Derek, as he cut into something on his plate. "17?" joked Derek.

Meredith tried to chew the piece of broccoli that she had in her mouth, without choking on it. She felt her body tense up as the question was asked. Why was it that every word or sound either of them made, was making her almost have a heart attack. "_Pull yourself together Meredith!"_ thought Meredith.

"No." said Meaghan with a smile, clearly flattered for looking older. "Fifteen. I'm a sophomore."

"I can't even believe you're fifteen." said Lexie with a small smile. "I feel like you were just that seven year old little girl with those cute little ponytails."

Meredith smiled at her sister's comment, as she looked at her daughter. She couldn't believe she was fifteen either. She had grown into a bright, beautiful young woman. She could still vividly remember the day she was born though. That would always be very clear.

_Meredith moaned as she felt another pain rip through her abdomen. She gripped the side of the bed, her knuckles turning white from the pressure. _

"_Just keep breathing Mere." encouraged Lexie from she stood next to her sister's hospital bed._

"_Lexie just shut up about the breathing!" said Meredith harshly, as she gasped and reached for her stomach again, gripping the Boston General hospital gown. She reached for sister's hand, with her free one and squeezed it mercifully. She let out a ragged breath as the contraction ended. She sighed as she leaned back against the pillow. _

"_I can't do this." said Meredith as she shook her head and pulled her hair away from her neck, trying to cool herself down._

"_Yes you can. Meredith you're one of the strongest people I know. You can definitely do this." said Lexie with an encouraging tone in her voice._

"_No I can't. I really can't do this." said Meredith as she shook her head. Her eyes filled with tears as she looked at Lexie. "I want Derek."_

_Lexie's relaxed demeanor immediately changed, as she heard those words escape her sister's lips. face. "You want Derek?" questioned Lexie timidly, unsure if she had heard correctly. _

_Meredith shook her head yes as she bent forward and moaned, as another pain seared through her. "Please" begged Meredith through gritted teeth._

_Lexie nodded furiously understanding her, and quickly left the room in search for Mark, leaving Meredith alone. Meredith let another ragged breath as she wiped a tear that fell. She would not fall apart. Not now. She had made it through nine months without him. After what felt like it had been an eternity; but in reality was only twenty minutes Lexie returned._

"_Anything?" asked Meredith as she chewed on an ice-chip from the cup from her bedside._

_Lexie smiled as best as she could, and squeezed her sister's hand gently. "Mark's working on it. He's trying to reach Derek." said Lexie._

_Meredith knew the look on her sister's face. That was the face and the reassuring smile that all doctor's used when they didn't want to upset a patient. She knew that face all too well; but she had never been on the receiving end of it. Meredith inhaled sharply as another contraction tore through her. She closed her eyes for the remaining part of the contraction._

"_And?" questioned Meredith as the contraction slowly ended._

_Mark opened the door and poked his head in. "Is it alright if I come in?" asked Mark nervously. _

_Meredith nodded and motioned for him to come in. "I just asked Lexie? Did you call him, is he coming?" asked Meredith._

_Mark sighed and walked over to the side of Meredith's bed. "I'm sorry Meredith. I tried calling a couple of times, but it keeps going straight to voicemail. I even paged him, but he's not getting anything." said Mark._

_Meredith sighed as she felt her lip tremble, and tears well up in her eyes. "But I need him here." said Meredith as her voice quivered._

"_I called Cristina and she's on her way. She was on the next flight out, she might make it in time." said Mark._

"_But I need Derek." said Meredith, feeling weaker and weaker by the second. She hated being weak, but right now she just needed one person, and that one person happened to be on the other side of the country. "I just need Derek." said Meredith, as she went from misty eyed to sobbing. _

_Lexie looked at Mark with wide eyes, seeing that Meredith was beyond upset at this point. "Do something." mouthed Lexie as she stroked Meredith's hand, which she was holding._

"_Meredith. Meredith please don't cry. You're going to upset the baby." said Mark as he gently rubbed Meredith's shoulder to try and calm her down._

"_I can't do this without him." said Meredith as she gripped the sheets. She sucked in a breath as she continued to sob, her breathing quickly becoming erratic. _

_All the machines that Meredith was hooked up to started blaring and beeping. Both Mark and Lexie's heads whipped around to see what was going on. The fetal monitor was showing that the baby's heart rate was declining and that Meredith's heart rate and blood pressure was increasing._

_Mark watched Lexie freeze in front of him, not knowing how to respond to the situation that was quickly unfolding. "Meredith you need to calm down." said Mark as he tried to take control of the situation._

_Meredith shook her head as she put her hand on her chest. "I can't." she said as gasped for air, tears continuing to stream down her cheeks._

_Mark pulled the oxygen mask down from above and place it over Meredith's mouth. "Watch me, okay?" asked Mark as he took in a breath of air, trying to get Meredith to mimic him. "Just follow me."_

_Meredith slowly sucked in deep breaths, easing some of the tension in her chest. Mark and Lexie both looked back at the monitors that were slowly coming back down to normal levels. Meredith dragged her hand across her cheek wiping her face free of tears._

_Lexie, who had finally snapped back into reality, pushed Meredith's hair out of her eyes and took hold of her hand. "We're not going anywhere; we'll be here for however long you need us to be. You can do this."_

_Meredith nodded behind the mask as her mind raced with thoughts. If anything were to happen to this baby, because she couldn't stay calm, she honestly did not know how she would forgive herself. "Do not screw this up Grey." she thought to herself. "You can do this."_

Meredith shook her head as she felt her eyes moisten at the memory. Maybe if Derek had come, things would have been different. Meaghan and Derek wouldn't be meeting as strangers. Maybe for once in her life; if she hadn't ran, her life would finally be normal.

Meredith stood up and pushed her chair in, as everyone turned to see what she was doing. "I'm not, um, feeling well. I think I'm going to go lay down upstairs." said Meredith

She was immediately shot back with a chorus of "What's wrong? Are you in pain?", a typical response from a table full of doctors.

"Are you okay Mom?" asked Meaghan with a worried look. "What's wrong?" asked Meaghan concern evident in her voice.

"I'm fine really. I'm just going to go and lie down." said Meredith as she nodded her head to her own plan and quickly walked out of the room and up the stairs.

She quickly walked into the guest room, where she and Meaghan would be staying. She sat down on the bed and looked around the room. Her eye caught a picture on the nightstand. It was a picture of her and Meaghan, taken a few days after Meaghan was born. She shook her head and laid down on the pillow starting to cry, wishing all of this would just go away.

_**GAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAG**_

Meredith awoke with a start, as she heard knocking on the door. She blinked as she lifted her head slightly, figuring she must have cried herself to sleep. She looked to see Derek standing at the doorway.

"I didn't mean to wake you." said Derek with a soft smile as he walked into the room and sat at the edge of the bed next to Meredith. "How you feeling?" he asked.

"Better. A lot better. Is everyone still downstairs?" asked Meredith as she turned to look at the clock, realizing she had fallen asleep for the past two hours.

"Nope. I'm the last to go home. I just wanted to check in and make sure you were feeling okay." said Derek.

Meredith smiled slightly, at his words. "Thanks I'm feeling better though." said Meredith.

"You sure?" asked Derek as he ran his hand across her cheek, in attempt to check for a fever. "No dizziness or blurring of the vision?" joked Derek

"I'm fine Dr. Shepherd." said Meredith with a grin as she sat up slightly leaning against the pillow. "I just feel bad I slept through dinner. Is Meaghan still downstairs?"

"Yeah. She and Allie had taken the kids to play outside earlier. The two of them are in the basement now." said Derek.

"Good. I didn't want to scare her before. I just needed to lie down." admitted Meredith, as she pulled at the sleeves of her sweater to keep her warmer.

"She's a pretty terrific kid. You got pretty lucky." said Derek with a smile. "She reminds me of you."

Meredith blushed slightly, at his comment. _"Stop it Meredith!"_ she thought to herself. They both looked at each other, a lull in the conversation very evident.

"Well, I just wanted to make sure you were okay." said Derek as he stood up. "I'm looking forward to working with you again. Well, goodnight." said Derek as he bent down and kissed Meredith on the forehead.

Meredith watched him retreat back from the bed and head for the door. _"I should tell him. He deserves to know he has a daughter. He's not a bad guy he's a good guy." thought Meredith_

"Derek?" called Meredith, finally finding her voice in her throat. She watched as he turned around to face her. She suddenly couldn't the put the words she wanted to say into a sentence. "I'm glad to be back." said Meredith instead.

"I'm glad you're back too." said Derek with a smile, as he looked at her. "Good night." said Derek as he waved and walked out of the room.

"Good Night"

_**Read and Review!**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**Can I just start out by saying how sorry I am for delaying the update of this story; somehow I feel as though it was just updated because I'm still getting comments! Life has been insane between school and rehearsals I have like no time to do anything! But I finally have some time and I couldn't wait to finally write this! You guys honestly don't know how much I appreciate all the comments and reviews for this story; because I feel exactly the same way about it! Honest to god every time I would write something for school or in general this would be on mind and it would drive me nuts at how much I wanted to write! Just a fair warning Meredith talks to herself a lot in this chapter. But enough rambling; happy reading!**_

Meredith; sat at the nurses desk in the Neuro Wing of Seattle Grace as she hurriedly scribbled onto her charts. She sighed when she saw the other two charts that still had to be filled out. She had gone into surgery three hours ago and had just come out a few minutes ago; and was now behind on her charting.

She quickly glanced at her watch. Meaghan would be meeting her here in less than ten minutes to head over to the new apartment she had found. After two weeks of staying with Mark and Lexie; Meredith decided that they were going to need their own space; and found a two bedroom apartment not far from the hospital. She and Meaghan were heading over there today to move in some things and stay the night. Meaghan would be seeing the apartment for the first time. Along with buying an apartment, Meredith had also been successfully avoiding Derek. They hadn't had too many surgeries together; and when they did it was small conversation; and anything outside of the OR was friendly chatter.

"Mom!" called a voice; jerking Meredith out of her thoughts. She looked up to see Meaghan quickly running towards her with her leather tote bag bouncing on her shoulder and her curls flying in the air.

"Hey." said Meredith with a smile. "How was school?" asked Meredith as she flipped the chart closed and turned to look at Meaghan.

"Awesome. Mom guess what? Remember how I said that there was homecoming coming up and everyone takes a date but I didn't think anyone would take me because I'm the new girl." rambled Meaghan.

Meredith smiled at her daughter's speedy chatter. "Yes I remember. So what happened?" asked Meredith knowing what her daughter was going to say.

"One of the sweetest; hottest guys in school asked me!" said Meaghan with a smile as she leaned against the nurse's desk. "I can't believe it; I guess I'm not the newbie loser I thought I was." said Meaghan.

Meredith clucked her tongue and raised her eyebrow. "You know very well you're not a loser and you'll never be one. You're a smart, independent, beautiful young woman and you know it." said Meredith with a soft smile.

"Sappy Mom. Less sappy lovey-dovey." said Meaghan with a joking grin. Meredith rolled her eyes and laughed at Meaghan's tone.

"I just have to finish these charts and then we can go. Sound good?" asked Meredith as she clicked open her pen and began scribbling onto the chart.

"Okay." nodded Meaghan as she looked up to see Derek walking down the corridor. "Derek!" she called out with a smile and a wave; as he waved back and began walking over.

Within the last three weeks; Derek had been popping over quite a lot. Lexie kept telling Meredith that he definitely wasn't there to see Mark. Meredith would just frown and walk away when she would make this comment. With Derek popping over so much; he and Meaghan had been talking and joking around.

"_Too bad she has no idea who he really is._" thought Meredith as she watched Derek approach the desk. In the three weeks Meredith had been here; she hadn't dared to bring it up with either of them. It was something she was hoping would eventually just fade away; but in all reality it was all going to have to come out eventually.

"Hey." said Derek with a grin; as he greeted both of the women.

Meredith just responded with a smile as she continued to scribble notes. "_Maybe if I don't talk; he won't."_

"Did you work a twelve hour shift?" asked Derek. "You were here before me and I got here at around six thirty this morning."

Meredith looked up at the clock to see it approaching five o'clock; she had been paged early this morning and hadn't even had a chance to sit down until now; let alone think.

"Yeah I was paged in at five o'clock for a crash victim." said Meredith as she closed the chart and handed it to the nurse next to her. "Then I scrubbed in on that surgery for five hours and then had a craniotomy and post-ops to check in on." said Meredith as she stretched her hands above her; trying to wake herself up.

"So I take it then you're going home and won't want to scrub in with me on a corpus callosotomy." asked Derek in a nonchalant voice; as he held the chart up in front of him.

Meredith's eyes bugged out slightly. This was a pretty un-common procedure that she had only watched once when she was an intern; and performed once when she was a resident. Cases like these didn't come around every day.

"How old is the patient?" asked Meredith; slightly intrigued.

"Six months old." said Derek with a grin; knowing that would be a deal-breaker.

Meredith's eyes widened even more than before. A callosotomy on a six month old was even rarer. "I'm in." said Meredith with a grin as she stood up and pushed herself away from the desk.

"Good." said Derek with a smile that practically lit up the sky. "I haven't had a case like this in a long time; the time before that though was with you." said Derek as he smiled slightly at the memory.

Meredith's heart fluttered slightly at the way he was looking at her. _"How do those dreamy eyes still have the same damn affect on me?"_ asked Meredith to herself as she smiled at him.

"Mom." called Meaghan; as Meredith turned to her daughter. Meredith had been so focused on Derek and the surgery she had almost forgotten Meaghan was there.

"What about me? What am I supposed to do while you're in surgery? What about the apartment? We were supposed to move in tonight. We have a lot of_ heavy_ things to move in." said Meaghan as she emphasized the word and looked at her mother.

"Tell you what; your mom and I will be out of surgery by eight thirty why don't I come over and help move you guys in. I'll move that heavy stuff and we'll order some dinner." said Derek.

"No really its o….." started Meredith; as she waved her hand before she was quickly interrupted by Meaghan.

"Yeah that sounds great." said Meaghan as she jumped in to respond. "I'll meet you both in the lobby at eight forty five." said Meaghan as she re-adjusted her backpack. "I'm going to go see if I can find Aunt Lexie. Bye." said Meaghan as she quickly took off down the hall.

"Pizza and some moving. Sounds like a date." said Derek with a grin as he walked away to go scrub in.

Meredith swallowed nervously as she heard those words repeat over and over again in her mind. "A date?" asked Meredith out loud to herself. Did he just say date? She groaned as she headed towards the OR; this was going to be a long surgery and an even longer night.

_**GAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAG**_

Meredith quickly unlocked the door to the apartment; as Meaghan and Derek stood behind her anxiously waiting to get out of the chilly September air. She opened the door and stepped into the small walkway.

"Home sweet home." said Meredith as she quickly took her jacket off and slipped out of her boots.

"More like home sweet _small _home." said Meaghan as she threw her jacket onto the floor and looked around.

Meredith glared at her; as Derek chuckled slightly at the comment. She quickly turned to him and his smile immediately faltered. He cleared his throat before looking around at the small space.

"It's very…….. cozy." answered Derek with a sheepish smile.

Meaghan giggled at Derek's comment as she put her bag on the floor. Meredith glared at her daughter again before; sighing herself as she truly saw how small the place was.

"It's not a permanent place. The market isn't great right now; so this is the best I could do." said Meredith as she tried to reassure herself.

"How many boxes do we have to unpack?" asked Meaghan as she looked around at the boxes the surrounded the three of them in the living room.

"A lot." answered Meredith. "So Megs you and I will get started on these boxes and then there's the U-Haul trailer in the driveway with our couch and chairs; Derek maybe you can get those?" asked Meredith.

Derek's eyes and mouth widened in mock shock. "You mean I'm not just here to stand around and look pretty?" asked Derek.

Meredith grinned at him as she tore open the box in front of her. "Nope I keep you around for lots of things." answered Meredith. Derek grinned back at her before turning and heading outside.

Meredith's grin faltered slightly as she realized what she had said. "_Did I just flirt with him?_" she asked subconsciously. Meredith sighed as she opened the box; she had better the way she was saying things. Or this night could turn into a very _long_ night; that didn't have a single thing to do with unpacking boxes.

_**GAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAG**_

"I can't believe you like artichoke and spinach pizza." said Meaghan as she took a bite of her second slice of pizza. "I swear I thought I was the only person in the world that liked this combination." said Meaghan.

"No I either get cheese or this. Your Uncle Mark and your mom used to tease me about being heath conscious with pizza; but it just tastes good." said Derek as he looked over at Meredith who was fidgeting with her napkin.

Meredith sat uncomfortably twisting her paper napkin as she listened to the conversation. One of them could figure out the relationship they had in twenty seconds and then everyone's lives would un-scramble.

"You okay Mere?" asked Derek gently; as he placed his napkin over his dish. "You seem jumpy."

Meredith gulped back the lump that was forming in the back of her throat. "Yeah I'm fine. I guess I'm just eager to finish un-packing the last couple of things."

"Well I have homework that needs to be done. Mom am I sleeping on the mattress we brought?" asked Meaghan as she pushed herself up from the table.

"Yeah that's fine. I'll just crash on the couch for now. We're going to have to get you a bed frame and me a mattress and a bed." said Meredith.

Meaghan nodded at her mother; before reaching down and grabbing her school bag from where it had been abandoned before. "Okay. Good night Mom." said Meaghan as she walked over to Meredith and hugged her as Meredith kissed her forehead.

"Night Megs. Don't stay up too late doing work." said Meredith; with a serious tone in her voice.

Meaghan once again nodded her head before turning to Derek. "Good night Derek." said Meaghan as she reached out and hugged him tightly.

Derek look surprised at first to what Meaghan was doing; but then returned the hug before they both pulled away. Meaghan then turned and walked to the back of the apartment where the two bedrooms were.

Meredith sighed; as she realized what she had just witnessed. She then stood up and picked up the paper plates they had been eating on and began to the throw them away; in a garbage bag.

"All I really have left is a few boxes; so if you don't want to stay you don't have too." said Meredith as she brushed her hands of crumbs and headed back over into the living room area and began opening a box.

"Mere stop. I wouldn't be here if I didn't want to help." said Derek as he opened anther box and began to un-pack a lamp and some books. "Besides like you said it's only a few more boxes.

Meredith smiled a light smile; before returning her attention to the box. Within the next half an hour she and Derek had gone through almost all the rest of the boxes. She could feel the exhaustion from the day finally creeping up on her; but refused to stop until she was done. There was only one more box. She pulled it open to reveal photo albums. She took out the first one and opened it. She smiled at what she saw.

"Take a look at this." called Meredith to Derek; who was currently trying to put together a lamp. He got up from where he was kneeling and walked over to where Meredith had sat down on the couch. She leaned closer and shifted the book for him to see. "That's Meaghan at two days old."

Derek smiled at the picture of the newborn. Most newborn pictures weren't flattering but not Meaghan's. She had her eyes open and had a look of almost surprise on her face.

"She was really alert for a newborn wasn't she?" asked Derek as Meredith flipped to the next page of pictures to where it looked to be like Meaghan was being taken home.

"You have no idea." said Meredith as she flipped to when Meaghan was a year and half and sitting in a high chair covered in cake. Meredith giggled slightly at the picture. "She was in the bath for hours after that."

Derek smiled as Meredith continued to look at the pictures on the page. "May I?" asked Derek as he outstretched his hands slightly to get a better look at the pictures.

Meredith nodded as she handed the book over to Derek. She the leaned her head back against the top of the couch. Derek then flipped to a picture of when Meaghan was toothless.

"She lost both those teeth three days apart from each other. She was upset at first because she didn't like how she didn't have any front teeth; but she was thrilled when she got double from the tooth fairy."

For the next few minutes; Derek and Meredith flipped through next few pages; stopping every so often for Meredith to comment or tell a story about the picture. Derek flipped to the next page and waited for Meredith to say something. When she didn't; he looked over to see her sleeping. He put the album down on the floor and reached for the afghan that had been unpacked earlier. He then gently laid it over Meredith's body and watched her chest rise and fall with each breath she took.

Derek then reached out and kissed her forehead; holding it there for a moment. He smiled as he watched Meredith snuggle deeper into couch and drift back into sleep. He then looked down at the box of albums that still needed to be unpacked. He unpacked the albums and laid them on the floor; not knowing where Meredith would want to keep them. He peered into the box to see a sheet of paper at the bottom. He lifted it put and picked it up to examine it more closely. It read;

_**Birth Certificate **_

_Meaghan Elise Grey- Shepherd_

_March 11__th__ 2008 4:54 am_

_7 pounds; 6 ounces and 19 inches long._

_Parents: Meredith Elizabeth Grey and Derek Christopher Shepherd_

_**Dum; dun; dun!!! I know I'm evil by leaving it off at that; but I promise the wait for the update will not be as long! As always reviews make my day =D**_


	4. Chapter 4

_**So all of you probably though it would be another month of not hearing from me, didn't you? After my author's note? Well turns out when you have the flu there's not much to do besides write. So that's exactly what I did all weekend. This chapter is the one that motivated me to write this story; it has been looming around in my head for quite some time. I'm thinking the next update for this story will probably be around Thanksgiving weekend maybe a little later, but don't fear it won't be for long! Happy Reading =)**_

Meredith awoke the next morning to the light brightly illuminating the room. She blearily blinked her eyes as she sat up and noticed that she had been covered in a blanket. She smiled at Derek's act of kindness. How could she avoid and ignore a man that sweet. She knew she should tell him that all the feelings she had felt so many years ago were still there, but more importantly she should also be telling him about Meaghan. She sighed as she shifted her legs so her feet sat dangling slightly above the floor. She would start by telling him whichever one would be easier to address. And she would do it today.

**

* * *

**

Meredith glanced up from where she stood leaning against the nurse's desk, to see Lexie standing next to her slumped against the desk. Meredith closed the chart she had been filling out and turned to her sister.

"You okay?" asked Meredith as she re-tied her hair back into a ponytail at the nape of her neck.

"I just spent eight hours in surgery and it wasn't even my own. I held a clamp for Mark the entire procedure. I should have never offered to help." huffed Lexie.

"Well I just spend six hours in surgery, in which the patient coded twice and when I woke up this morning Meaghan was freaking out about a dress for tonight's dance. Because yesterday when she told me she was going to homecoming, she neglected to tell me it was today. So I had to drop a surgery this morning and let her skip her first two periods so she could get a dress." said Meredith.

Lexie sighed and looked at her sister shaking her head. "Alright you win." said Lexie.

"That's what I thought." said Meredith with a nod as she handed the chart she had completed to the nurse. She then felt her pager vibrate against her waistband as it led out an eerie beep. She looked down to see it was Derek paging her to an on-call room. "It's Derek." she told Lexie.

"Have fun." said Lexie with a wave of her hand from her slumped position.

Meredith nodded and quickly walked off in search of the specific on-call room. She let out a shaky breath as she turned towards the east corridor. "_Please let this go okay."_

* * *

Meredith walked into the on-call room to find Derek standing there pacing the room. This had to be the only on-call room in this hallway and one of the few in the east corridor. It was un-usually quiet around here.

"Hi." started Meredith as she shut the door behind her. "So we need to talk about some things." said Meredith.

"Yeah. Yeah we do." said Derek bitterly as he crossed his arms over his scrub-clad chest and stood facing Meredith.

Meredith shot Derek a confused look at the tone he had said that in. "Well I just wanted to tell you that…"

"That I have a daughter?" shouted Derek as his voice echoed throughout the small room.

Meredith opened her mouth to speak. "How did you…." started Meredith as she opened her mouth. Her throat felt tight and dry as she looked at Derek.

"How'd I find out? The birth certificate at the bottom of the box last night." answered Derek. He let out an angry sigh as he raked his fingers through his hair. "I just have one question. Why didn't you tell me?"

"I….. I don't know." answered Meredith quietly. She averted her gaze from his; feeling his eyes burning into her face, begging for some sort of an answer.

"You don't know? Well that's a great answer Meredith!" shouted Derek. Meredith cringed at the loudness of voice. She ignored his persistent shouting as her mind thought back to that one day almost sixteen years ago.

_Meredith knocked loudly on the apartment door for third time. She tapped her foot anxiously as she listened to hear someone approaching the door. She held her breath slightly as the door opened to reveal Mark._

"_Meredith? What the hell are you doing here?" asked Mark bewildered as he opened the door wider. "Come in."_

"_Is Lexie here? I need to talk to her its important." said Meredith as she looked behind Mark and into the apartment to see if she could see her sister. _

"_No she's at the hospital. Come in you'll wait inside for her." said Mark as he ushered her in with his hand._

"_No, no it's fine. I'm going to go. Do me a favor and don't tell her I was here." said Meredith as she turned from the entryway to leave._

"_I don't think so." said Mark as he grabbed Meredith's arm and pulled her into the apartment. "You think I'm just going let you leave and disappear again when no one has heard or seen you in over a month." _

"_Mark let me go!" shouted Meredith as he continued to drag her farther into the apartment. "Mark!" shouted Meredith as he sat her down at the island by the kitchen._

_Mark walked over to the liquor cabinet and took out a bottle of tequila. He then took out a glass and poured the rust colored liquid into it. He walked over to the table and handed her the glass. _

"_Drink then talk." said Mark as he stood on the other side of the counter facing Meredith._

"_I can't." said Meredith as she pushed the glass back to him. "Listen I really need to go." said Meredith as she went to stand up._

"_Sit Grey." ordered Mark. Meredith complied and sank herself back down into the chair. "Have a drink and then start talking." said Mark as he leaned against the counter._

"_I already told you I can't drink that." said Meredith with an icy tone. "Now can I go?" asked Meredith pleadingly._

"_No you're not moving. And why can't you drink?" asked Mark confusedly as crossed his arms over himself and eyed Meredith._

"_Because I'm pregnant!" shouted Meredith._

_Mark's lip's parted slightly like he was going to say something and then closed them again. He then let out a sigh as he looked at Meredith who was staring at the counter._

"_Congratulations?" questioned Mark as he raised his glass in a toast. He immediately put his glass down when Meredith shot him a look of death._

"_No it's not congratulations. Because I had no intent on returning back to Seattle and I had to come back because of something that I don't even know if I'm keeping!" shouted Meredith._

"_You don't even know if you're keeping it?" questioned Mark quietly. "Meredith you can't do that. You have to tell Derek." said Mark._

"_No I don't. I came back here for some sort of an answer to find that no one is around to talk to. Izzie has cancer; Cristina is hospital crazy, Alex doesn't care and George is dead! So I thought I'd come and talk to my sister; and trust my sister with something so big, but when I get here I find out even she's not here!" cried Meredith as she felt tears start to build in her eyes._

"_But Derek's here. And I'm sure if you told him he'd understand and wouldn't be mad like you seem to think he would be. He's been worried sick about you for the last month. He stopped working for three weeks. Then he realized you probably weren't coming back so he went back to surgery." said Mark._

"_I can't tell him Mark! You don't get it. If I tell him that I'm pregnant with his child he's going to think I'm all whole and healed and I'm not. Because if I was whole and healed, I wouldn't be pondering whether or not to keep my child." said Meredith. She then broke down into sobs as she hung her head in hands, clearly ashamed that the thought of doing that had even crossed her mind._

_Mark sighed as he watched Meredith fall apart. He never did do well with crying women. He walked over to Meredith and awkwardly patted her on the back. He soon realized that this wasn't going to be very effective and pulled her into hug._

"_It's going to be fine."_

Meredith looked up at Derek from where she was standing. She put her arms on her hips and looked him directly in the face.

"For your information I did try and tell you. Twice! I came back one when I was four months pregnant and you were in an emergency surgery that lasted for hours. I chickened out and left. The second time I called you as I was giving _birth_ to your daughter. I called you about eight times. _I wanted_ you there." said Meredith as she turned on her heels and left the room.

She left Derek standing there; speechless. He sighed as he sat down on the lower bunk bed running his fingers through his hair. Not having a single clue in the world what his next move was.

**

* * *

**

Meredith furiously scribbled a prescription out, as she leaned against the nurse's counter. _"The nerve of Derek."_ Really? Did he honestly think that she hadn't tried at all to tell him. She felt a hot tear run down her cheek; and she briskly wiped it away.

"Stupid brain man." muttered Meredith.

Mark walked up to the nurse's counter. He smirked as he leaned against. "Mad at the paper Mere?" questioned Mark with amusement. Meredith glared at him with her watery eyes. Mark's smile immediately faltered. "You okay?"

"Fine." said Meredith as she ripped the paper off the prescription pad. "Do you need anything?" asked Meredith.

"Seven car pile up on the freeway. A lot of concussions; but only one serious neuro case. The chief told me to find you and tell you to go get ready for surgery." said Mark.

"I don't want it give to Derek." stated Meredith as she turned around and began re-writing the prescription she had started.

"Give it to Derek? That's not a very Meredith like thing to say. Especially when something like surgery is involved." said Mark as Meredith continued to ignore him.

Meredith turned towards him as he smiled a goofy grin. She cracked a small smile. "Is it a good case?"

"Read the chart." said Mark as he handed the thick grey book. He watched as her face broke into a grin.

"Alright I'm in."

**

* * *

**

Derek stood at nurse's desk of the Neuro ICU wing, finishing updating a patient's chart. There were currently no nurses at the desk; and the hallways were eerily quiet. The accident earlier had most surgeons in surgery right now; but instead he was making night rounds. He had checked the board earlier and Meredith had grabbed the only neuro case that actually needed surgery. He could have very easily walked into the OR and demanded to take over, being that he was the Head of Neuro and she was just an attending but he wasn't one to do that. And especially not after the way he had treated Meredith this morning. Yelling probably hadn't been the best idea. He looked up when he suddenly heard the sound of heels furiously clicking. He looked up to see Meaghan.

"Meaghan? What are doing here?" asked Derek curiously as he quickly shut the chart and laid it down on the counter.

"I…I need to talk to my mom." said Meaghan as her voice shook. "Have you seen her?" asked Meaghan.

It was then when Derek noticed that Meghan was wearing a knee length gold dress; which had black lace at the top of the dress and under the bust of it. The color complimented Meaghan's skin color perfectly. She wore her natural curls down and loose and had nothing on her face expect mascara and lip-gloss.

"You look beautiful." said Derek with a small smile. "She's in surgery. She's been in there for a couple of hours so most likely it's a critical patient." said Derek.

"Oh okay." said Meaghan as played with the bracelet around her wrist. "What about Uncle Mark or Aunt Lexie?" asked Meaghan.

"They're both in surgery. You sure you don't want me to page your mom?" asked Derek as he finally noticed that she was upset.

"No. What about Uncle Alex? Aunt Izzie? Aunt Cristina? Uncle Owen? Callie? Arizona? Someone?" asked Meaghan as her voice rose slightly.

"Alex and Izzie are both in separate surgeries. Cristina, Owen and Callie are all scrubbed in on a trauma and Arizona went home a little while ago. There was an accident tonight so that's why no one is around." explained Derek.

Meaghan stood there staring at her feet, in the blink of an eye hot tears were pouring down her face as she tried to swipe them away.

"Meaghan?" asked Derek as he walked over to where the teenager was standing. He then saw the parade of tears falling from her eyes. "Hey. What's the matter?" asked Derek as he put his hand on her shoulder.

Meaghan sniffed and inhaled sharply as she tried to speak. "I… was right. My mom was wrong. Cole was given money …to go to homecoming with me. They all betted… on how long… I would actually believe… that he really like me." said Meaghan as she collapsed into sobs again.

"Hey. Hey." said Derek trying to get her to look at him. When that didn't do any justice, he pulled the petite girl into hug as she sobbed against him. He rubbed her back soothingly as he pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

"Shhh. It's going to be okay. You're going to be okay."

**

* * *

**

Meredith shook her head as she made her way to Derek's office shaking her head. She had been paged about three times since she had gotten out of surgery. She really didn't feel like doing any more arguing. Not after the surgery she just had. She approached the office and briskly threw open the door.

"Listen Derek I am not in the mood to…." started Meredith before she was shushed quickly by Derek.

Meredith glanced over to where Derek was sitting on the couch with his finger on his lip. She looked to see Meaghan asleep, her head resting on Derek's lap and a blanket placed over the rest of her. Meredith quickly walked over to her sleeping daughter and kneeled down.

"What the hell happened?" asked Meredith as she brushed a stray hair away from Meaghan's face.

"Bad dance experience." whispered Derek. He smiled sadly as he watched Meaghan's chest rise and fall, a tiny frown on her sleeping face showing the evidence of the night she'd had.

"Why didn't you page me?" asked Meredith as she looked at Derek narrowing her eyes at him.

"She didn't want me to. I asked her twice." said Derek.

She smiled a small smile at Derek; grateful of what he did for Meaghan. "You didn't tell her did you?" asked Meredith.

"After the night she had? Do you really think I'm that cruel?" asked Derek kiddingly. "No I didn't tell her." said Derek.

Meredith nodded. "Well I'd better wake her. Get her home." said Meredith as she went to pull back the blanket and gently wake the teenager.

"Don't wake her. Stay. Both of you sleep right here. She doesn't need to wake up and relive what happened again tonight." said Derek.

Meredith nodded as she kicked of her shoes and curled up in the little section that was left of the couch. Derek tossed her the extra blanket and one of the throw pillows with his free hand.

"Aren't you going to leave?" asked Meredith sleepily.

"Leave? She may not know I'm her dad, but dad's don't get up and leave when their daughter's are hurt and upset. I'm staying."

_**Reviews make my day =)**_


	5. Chapter 5

So I realize this update is long overdue. And I apologize. I did let you guys know it would be taking linger than expected but it took WAYYYY longer. Thanks everyone so much for all the reviews and feedback. They truly do brighten my day. Alright so I uploaded today for a specific reason. This chapter is my Holiday present to everyone out there. So for anyone that is celebrating now, Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas, Happy Chanukah, Happy Kwanza etc. I am on break so hopefully the next chapter will be up sooner than this one was. Happy reading=) And Happy Holidays. PS This chapter is broken into a lot of dirrent pieces and one flashback.

Meredith eye's fluttered opened as she woke. Her eyes roamed the dark room and she realized that she was in Derek's office where she had fallen asleep. She then moved her head slightly trying to get comfortable again and realized what she was sleeping on definitely wasn't a pillow. She looked down slightly to see that she had somehow crossed over to the other end of the couch and had ended up snuggling to Derek."_How in the hell did this happen?"_ Meredith questioned to herself. She glanced across the room and saw that the digital clock read that it was almost five o'clock in the morning. She had to be up soon anyways and she was so comfortable. "_This is a bad choice Grey."_ as she tried to reason herself out of staying in her current position. Although her mind was telling her one thing, her body was saying something completely different. And she had to admit she hadn't gotten this good of sleep in a long time. Would it really make a difference if she moved now when she had been there all night? Meredith closed her eyes and let herself succumb back to sleep, promising herself she would make sure to wake up before he did.

* * *

Derek groaned slightly as he felt Meredith shift on top of him and then fall back in a heap onto him. He glanced over at the digital clock. He looked to see Meredith's eyes closed and her chest rising and falling indicating she was peacefully sleeping. How had she even ended up on this side of the couch? Well it didn't matter now. He had to be honest this had been some of the best sleep he's had in fifteen years. He smiled softly at her knowing she was the reason. He then immediately caught himself and inwardly scolded. "_Stop it! She kept a child from you for fifteen years and never said one word to you or the kid. You should be furious with her still._ But somehow even with all the secrets and lies that had been un-covered; he couldn't and didn't want her to move. He wanted her to stay there forever.

* * *

Meredith opened her eyes when she heard a beeping coming for nearby. She blinked a few times and shifted as Derek sat up slightly and clicked off his watch, from which the offending noise was coming from.

"Good morning." whispered Derek trying to not wake up Meagan was curled up at the edge of the couch wit her resting on a pillow and her body curled up behind Meredith's legs.

"Hi." said Meredith, slumber evident in her voice. She immediately pulled off of Derek as shifted to a sitting position. "Sorry about that. I'm not sure I ended up over here. I don't remember falling asleep here. Tiny couch, I guess." rambled Meredith.

Derek grinned at her rambling. Some things truly do never change. "It's fine. Sorry about the watch. I didn't mean for it to wake you." said Derek as he glanced at the clock to see it was six thirty.

"It's fine. I actually have patients to check on." said Meredith as she pulled on her sneakers. "I'm going to let her sleep awhile longer and leave her a note for when she wakes up. Is it okay if she stays here?" she asked.

"Meredith, you know its fine. I still want to talk to you… about everything. Can you meet on the bench outside for coffee at eight?" asked Derek.

Meredith nodded as she quickly pulled her hair into a messy pony-tail. She then leaned over and kissed the top of Meaghan's head.

"We'll talk later." said Meredith as she quickly ran out, to make it in time for rounds with the group of interns and residents that would be presenting.

"Yeah." said Derek with a slight sigh as he sat down at his desk, knowing it might be a little past eight before they talked. Because once again Meredith was avoiding.

* * *

Derek looked up from where he was working at his desk; when he heard a slight moan and blankets shifting. He saw Meaghan blink a few times before her eyes adjusted to the light in the room.

"Mhmhmm. What time is it?" asked Meaghan as she turned on her side so her head was resting on the pillow; but she was able to see Derek.

"About quarter to eight. How're you doing?" asked Derek as he pushed back his chair and walked around to lean up against the front of his desk.

"I wish I was still sleep." said Meaghan with a tired grin. "And I still wish last night had never happened." said Meaghan as she glanced down at the gold dress she had slept in, a large reminder of what happened last night.

Derek smiled sadly at her and walked over and pulled the blanket closer to her as she snuggled deeper into the pillow and shut her eyes.

"Sleep for a little while longer and when you wake up; things will be better." said Derek deciding whether he was reassuring himself or the teenage girl.

Meaghan nodded as she started to succumb back into a peaceful sleep. Derek then turned to walk towards the door. His armed reached out to the door handle,

"Derek." said Meaghan as she sleepily turned her head. "Thank you for last night. I didn't plan to cry like that. It just happened." said Meaghan drowsily. "But thanks."

Derek smiled slightly again and walked back over and kissed Meaghan on top of her forehead.

"Sleep"

* * *

Meredith glanced up from where she was reading the newspaper on the bench outside to see Derek sit beside her with two cups of coffee. Its not that she didn't think he wouldn't come and find her; Derek never breaks a promise; but she was hoping this whole discussion could have been avoided for a little while longer since the last one on this topic had ended badly.

"Hey." said Derek as he handed her cup of coffee. "How were your patients?" he asked as he settled into the bench.

"Fine." said Meredith as she took a long sip of the caffeinated beverage. "I actually have a surgery scheduled in a few minutes so I…." started Meredith.

"Alright so we'll make this quick. I think we need to tell Meaghan about all of this and I think after that she should move in with me for a while." said Derek.

Meredith almost gagged on the hot beverage. "Move in with you? Derek, that's not a good idea. We moved into our apartment three days ago. You've only known she was yours for two and half. You can't rush into these things." said Meredith.

"I'm not saying we rush into it. But I think we should tell her and then let it sink in for a little while and then she can come up and stay with me." said Derek.

"Derek she's fifteen. This isn't going to be easy for her to accept. She might want nothing to do with her. She knows who you are, but she doesn't know who you are as her father." said Meredith.

"And whose fault is that? That she doesn't know me?" spat Derek.

Meredith opened her mouth to speak and nothing came out. She shook her head and stood up and then proceeded to take her half a cup of coffee and dump it on Derek's shoes.

"You know what Derek it's not only mine! So stop fucking blaming me for every aspect of this situation. _You _never called, wrote or came to find me. So stop blaming me." said Meredith as she turned and walked away, leaving Derek smelling like a big roast coffee bean.

* * *

Derek walked over to where Mark stood at the nurse's station. He leaned against the counter and sighed as a nurse handed him a patient's chart.

Mark wrinkled his nose as he looked at Derek. "Why do you smell like coffee?" asked Mark as he sipped his cappuccino.

"Because I have it in my shoes." answered Derek simply as he scribbled his signature on the chart and handed it back the nurse; nodding in confirmation.

"Why?" asked Mark with a questioning look.

"Meredith." Derek answered simply as he leaned against the counter. "I haven't seen you in almost two days. You had off the other day and yesterday you were in surgery all day. I have a daughter. Meredith's daughter."

Mark's face paled slightly as Derek told him the news. "That's great. That's really great news." said Mark as he averted his gaze to the chart so he wouldn't have to look at Derek.

"I don't know if it. Meredith is being herself and running from the situation and Meaghan has no idea." said Derek. He let out a loud frustrated sigh. "She never told me. That really is like a punch in the gut. Meaghan grew up without a father because I wasn't there." said Derek.

"There's nothing you could have done. You didn't know." said Mark as he continued to focus on the chart.

"I guess but…" started Derek before he noticed that Mark wasn't even looking at him. "Should I be insulted that you're paying more attention to the paper than our conversation?" questioned Derek.

Mark sighed as stood up slightly straighter and turned to look at Derek. "I need to tell you something. Something important. And you have to promise not to hit me or attempt to kill me." said Mark.

"Okay." said Derek slightly confused at Mark's sudden strange behavior.

"I knew about Meaghan. I've known that she's yours." admitted Mark.

Suddenly it hit Derek like a brick. Lexie had mentioned something, when he and Meredith had first seen each other again about remembering how cute Meaghan used to be when she was younger. He looked Mark directly in the eyes, asking the question with venom in his voice,

"How long have you known?" asked Derek. His eyes had immediately changed from their cheerful blue color, to an almost angry gray color.

Mark let a out a small sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair. He then looked at Derek and answered,

"I've known since Meredith was about three months pregnant."

Derek felt his fist muscles clenched in anger and wanted to act on their impulse and hit him. But he restrained himself. He stood there; at a loss what to even say. Mark sensing the tension in the air, tried to talk Derek down from the angry place he was currently in.

"Derek I..." started Mark.

"Don't talk to me." snapped Derek before Mark could even attempt to say anything. "If you talk to me I will hit you." said Derek as he turned and left.

_Meredith watched as her eight year old sat at the counter in the middle of the kitchen; sadly twirling an apple by its stem. She swiftly walked up and with the supplies she had in her current hand._

"_Hey you." said Meredith as she placed her stuff on the counter. She then leaned in and kissed Meaghan at the crown of her head and ran her fingers through her brown curls._

"_Hi Mommy." said Meaghan sadly as she continued to twirl with the apple._

_Meredith pulled her Meaghan into a bear-hug sensing her mood. She continued to rub her back for a few minutes and then leaned her forehead against hers. Meaghan had been upset ever since yesterday when the school had called and said if she didn't have a male figure to attend with, she couldn't go to Father/Daughter dance._

"_I know you're upset about the dance. But we'll make our own fun." said Meredith with a small encouraging smile._

"_We will?" questioned Meaghan her blue eyes, lighting up slightly at the thought._

"_Sure we will. We'll even make you look all pretty. I'll put a nice bow in your hair and use my lavender hairspray and then we'll put on that nice red dress that you have. And then we'll dance around to some music. Sound good?" said Meredith._

"_Yeah!"_

* * *

"_Meaghan look over here for me." said Meredith as she watched her eight year old jump around to the music they were playing. _

"_Look Mom my dress spins!" cried Meaghan as she spun around in a circle. The red satin dress pooled out perfectly with each spin. Meaghan's hair had been sectioned off with a tiny silver clip with a red gem in it. _

"_I see. Hold still for a second. 1. 2. 3. Cheese." said Meredith._

"_Cheese" repeated Meaghan with a grin, as they heard the doorbell ring. Meaghan looked curiously at the door. "Who's at the door?" questioned Meaghan._

_Meredith smiled as she shut off the stereo. "I don't know. Why don't you go open it?" suggested Meredith as they walked towards the door._

_Meaghan reached for the door handle and pulled the wooden door open. She then gasped at what she saw behind the screen door._

"_Uncle Mark!" cried Meaghan as she pushed open the glass door and shot into Mark's arms. He groaned slightly at the impact and carefully picked her up, trying to mess with the dress._

"_Hey Megs." said Mark with a grin. "Hi Mere." said Mark as he leaned in and kissed his sister-in-law on the cheek._

"_Hi Mark." said Meredith with a grin. She winked at him as he winked back at her. "Thank you." she mouthed._

"_Uncle Mark what are you doing here?" questioned Meaghan as Mark set her down on the ground._

"_What am I doing here?" questioned Mark with a grin as he bent down to his niece's height. "Well, I'm here to take you to the Sweetheart dance. That is, if you want me to take you." said Mark._

_Meaghan screamed excitedly as she ran back into Mark's arms jumping up down with sudden energy. Mark chuckled as he hugged her back. He looked over to Meredith._

"_I'll take that as a yes?" asked Mark._

"_Definitely a yes._

* * *

Meaghan smiled as she waved at Arizona as she passed by him heading towards the attendings lounge to find her mom. She walked towards the door and stopped when she heard Meredith yelling. She peered in to see Meredith pacing the room talking animatedly to Cristina and Izzie.

"I mean really who the hell does think he is? Saying that he wants her to stay with him for awhile. She barely knows him! He's being freaking ridiculous! And yes I'm aware that I kept her a secret from him but he keeps bringing it up! If Derek really did love me he would have called or tried to find me. No questions or concern. Absolutely nothing. I understand that he's upset and wants to get to know her. But she doesn't even know that he's her father!

Meaghan gasped slightly and all three head in the heard turned to see where the noise came from. Meredith's eyes widened. She took a few steps towards Meaghan.

"Meaghan I..." started Meredith as Meaghan took off down the hall.

"Meaghan!"

_**Happy Holidays everyone =)**_


	6. Chapter 6

_**I know. I know I should be hanging my head in shame for taking so long to update this story. I apologize deeply for letting it go this long, but as usual life got in the way. On a happier note Happy New Year! This is my first 2010 post. Alright so this chapter is a big confrontation chapter, where as next chapter will be a lot of flashbacks. Alright so off you go to read. I can assure you though you'll hear from me again before Valentines Day ;). Happy Reading =)**_

Meredith watched as her daughter ran off in the opposite direction. She quickly ran after her, calling her name, as Meaghan shoved her way through a group of interns and kept running. Meredith moved her way through the crowd, but Meaghan was long gone out of sight. She let out an angry sigh; she put her head to her on-coming migraine. That was not at all how she wanted Meaghan to find out about everything.

"Mere." called Cristina as she and Izzie walked up to her. Meredith shook her head indicating them to not say anything. "She won't go far. She's a good kid, she's not stupid." said Cristina re-assuring her person.

Meredith shook her head. "It doesn't matter. I have to go find her and talk to her. And I have to find Derek." said Meredith as she quickly grabbed hr bag from Izzie, who had brought it her and ran off towards the nearest elevator to find Derek, and then hopefully her daughter.

* * *

Meredith repeatedly pressed the elevator button as she tapped her foot anxiously. She listened to the irritable dinging until the elevator doors opened and conveniently enough, there stood Derek.

"We need to talk." said Meredith.

"Oh so now you want to talk." snapped Derek. Meredith looked at his eyes, seeing that they were once again a deep dark angry color, a polar opposite of how bright and happy they always were. As far as Derek was concerned he was still allowed to be very upset with Meredith right now.

Meredith shook her head and faced the front of the elevator as it dinged, signifying it was moving to the next floor. "Forget it." said Meredith.

They stood in silence for thirty seconds or so and then Derek looked over to see Meredith quickly wiping her face with the back of her hand, trying to get rid of evidence of tears. Derek felt his heart sink; he didn't mean to upset her. He walked over and pulled the emergency stop button.

"Meredith." said Derek as he walked over to her where she stood with her back facing him. "You know I didn't mean that." said Derek.

Meredith shook her head as she turned to meet his gaze. "It's not that. Meghan's gone." said Meredith.

"What?" questioned Derek. "What do you mean gone? Where did she go? When did she go?" asked Derek suddenly wanting more information.

"She over-heard me in the resident's lounge talking to Izzie and Cristina about everything. She knows about you. And I knew she would run when she heard, I was expecting that to happen whenever we told her. But she overheard me, and she's mad and hurt and upset. And she's a good kid, she really is. But with all this going on and her god knows where, I'm panicking about what she'll do or where she'll go." rambled Meredith in two very short breaths.

"Okay you need to breathe before we do anything." said Derek as he watched Meredith exhale slowly. "We're going to find her. I can positively guarantee you that. So no more bad thoughts about that. The rest of it we'll figure out when we talk to her." said Derek as he pulled the emergency stop button undone, and repeatedly pushed the button to the first floor.

Meredith nodded and stood silence for a moment before saying, "I'm a horrible person." said Meredith.

"You're not a horrible person. So never say that. _All_ of us have made some bad choices but that doesn't make you a horrible person." said Derek as he squeezed Meredith's arm gently.

The elevator doors quickly opened as they reached the lobby of the hospital. They quickly walked out of the hospital into the pounding Seattle rain. Derek reached into his suitcase and pulled out an umbrella holding it over the both of them. He felt his stomach tense, when he thought about his daughter wandering somewhere alone in the dark at night. He indicted to Meredith to follow him to his car.

"Come on. We've got a teenager to find."

* * *

Meaghan furiously rapped her hand against the door to Mark and Lexie's house. She felt her body start to shiver as the rain pelted harder onto her petite frame. Finally the door opened and Mark appeared.

"Meaghan?" questioned Mark as he opened the door wider. "What the heck are doing out in the rain?" questioned Mark.

Meaghan stepped into the house and looked Mark straight in the eyes before shoving him hard with both of her hands into his chest.

"What the hell was that for?" asked Mark his eyes questioning what the teenager girl was doing.

"You knew. You knew and you didn't tell me." said Meaghan as she shoved him again harder on the chest.

It then dawned on Mark what she was talking about. And why she was here in the pouring rain and why she looked angry one second and like she was going to burst into tears the next second.

"Meaghan." reasoned Mark as he tried to grab hold of her wrist in order to stop the repetitive shoving. "Hey." said Mark a little more forcefully when it didn't stop, but only got harder.

"I trusted you. You were more of a dad then he'll ever be. But I hate you." spat Meaghan as she kept hitting Mark harder and harder. "I hate you. I hate you." said Meaghan.

Mark finally got a hold of her wrists and pulled her tightly into his chest as she struggled against him. She let out a whimper as she started to sob.

"I hate them." sobbed Meaghan as she sobbed loudly in-between heavy sniffles and erratic breaths.

Mark quietly shushed the trembling girl as she gently rubbed her back soothingly. He felt his heart tare in two at how she was feeling. He knew from experience what it was like to grow up without parents that were never around, but to grow up not knowing one of your parents and then suddenly having them thrown into your life couldn't be easy.

"Mark? I thought I heard crying is…" called Lexie from behind the kitchen door. She stopped when she saw the situation in front of her. Mark motioned with his hand to get the phone. _"Call Meredith or Derek."_ he mouthed. "_They need to know where she is."_

Lexie nodded understanding him and disappeared back into the kitchen to make the phone call. Mark continued to stay with his arms wrapped around Meaghan as he continued to soothe her.

"It's going to be okay. You're going to be okay

* * *

Meredith swiftly charged through the door of Mark and Lexie's house, followed quickly by Derek. She stood in the foyer, as Mark walked in from the kitchen followed by Lexie.

"Where is she?" questioned Meredith as her eyes scanned the room looking for proof that she was here.

"Her clothes were soaking wet. I told her to borrow something from Allie, so she's upstairs in her room. Nobody is home except for us." said Lexie.

"Well we need to talk to her right now." said Derek. "Before this gets anymore out of control." said Derek.

"It's been out of control." shot back Mark. Derek shot him a look as he took a step forward to confront Mark.

"Derek." said Meredith. "Now is not a good time for the two of you to beat the crap out of each other, so don't even think about it." said Meredith, as Derek took a step back so he was standing at the same level as Meredith. "Mark call her down, so she won't run from me again." said Meredith

Mark looked up the stairs almost fearful of how this was going to play out. The way Meghan had just been with him, indicated that she was very upset and angry right now and that this was probably not going to go over well.

"Meghan. Can you come down here?" called Mark hesitantly.

Meaghan appeared at the stairs and quickly came down, not noticing Meredith and Derek till she got to the bottom steps. She stepped off and immediately stood closer to Mark and Lexie.

"Hi." said Meredith softly, not wanting to jump down her throat. "There's a lot stuff we need to talk about." said Meredith.

"You think?" shot back Meaghan.

"Meaghan." warned Mark as he put his hand on her arm in attempt to calm her down. "Don't." said Mark.

"No Mark, let her say what she needs to say. She's right there is _way_ more than enough that we need to talk about. So we're going to go home and three of us are going to sit down and talk." said Meredith.

"No. There's no way I'm going with home with either one of you." said Meaghan. "I'm staying here, Uncle Mark and Aunt Lexie said I'm always welcome here so I'm using their offer." said Meaghan.

"Meaghan don't be un-reasonable." said Derek.

Meaghan's eye glared at him, the same angry shade Derek's had been a few hours ago. "You are the last person who should be saying anything. You don't _get_ to say what I can't and cannot do." said Meaghan.

"Meaghan." said Meredith, shocked at the tone of voice Meaghan was using when talking to them.

"Mere its fine." re-assured Derek as he looked at Meaghan who had locked eyes with him.

"No. It's not fine. She's not allowed to talk to you like that." said Meredith as she stepped forward and looked Meaghan directly in the eyes. "I want you to listen to me, and listen to me really carefully. You're coming home with us right now, so we can talk. You're not allowed to talk to Derek or myself like you just did. So get your jacket because we're going _right_ now." sternly said Meredith.

"No." said Meaghan emotion clear in her voice. "You can't make me. I won't." said Meaghan as she grabbed onto Mark's waist and hugged him tightly, almost as security. "They can't do that can they?"

Mark sighed as he looked at the teenager, who was clearly at a loss right now at what to say or do, or even how to act. "I'm afraid they can honey. They're your parents. They can do just about anything." said Mark.

Meaghan looked at him for a second before swiftly pulling away and running out of the door. They heard the car door slam loudly, a signal that they presumed mean that she was in the car. Meredith winced slightly at the sound. Mark and Derek seemed to have locked eyes in the past five minutes and we're staring each other down.

"Um. I'm going to go. Because I need to talk to her before this blows up anymore. I'll call you guy's later." said Meredith as she flipped her hand in a half wave and turned on her heels and left, followed in suit by Derek.

* * *

"Meaghan stop it." ordered Meredith, as she, Derek and Meaghan entered the small apartment. "All you've been doing is loudly slamming things and that's really not going to get us anywhere." said Meredith as she threw her coat onto the coat rack.

"Shut up." shot back Meaghan, as she threw her jacket onto the couch.

"Meaghan." warned Derek as he watched the teenager's attitude worsening by the minute. "Stop. You having an attitude isn't going to help with this." said Derek.

"Maybe I wasn't clear before but I asked you to shut up two. So both of you shut up." said Meghan as she headed towards her room.

Meredith quickly grabbed her arm spinning her around to face her. "I've had just about enough of this. I get that you're upset and hurt and annoyed as hell right now, but you need to lose the attitude right now. Because I _refuse_ to let you talk to us the way that you have been." shouted Meredith, finally losing it.

Meghan stood in silence for a moment and then responded by saying, "You're just like her."

"Who?" shouted Meredith angrily. "Who am I just like?" questioned Meredith, so overwhelmed with anger she wasn't catching her daughter's reference.

"Your bitch of a mother, Ellis Grey. You're just like her." shouted Meaghan as she took off towards her room, and the last thing heard was the door slamming.

Derek watched as Meredith stood there frozen at her daughter's words. He looked at her with gentle eyes, knowing the words that were just thrown at her stung in a way that he would never understand.

"Meredith." said Derek as he walked over from where he stood. "Mere." said Derek as he reached out and lightly touched her cheek, in a soothing gesture.

Meredith suddenly seemed to come out of her daze and she shook her head, as she removed his hand from her cheek. "Don't. Just don't." said Meredith.

Derek watched as she quickly slipped on her shoes and grabbed her keys. "Where are you going?" he asked. "Mere?" he questioned when she didn't answer.

"I just… I need… I need to take a walk." said Meredith as she quickly walked out the front door, it slamming almost as loudly as Meaghan's door.

Derek let out a frustrated sigh as he sat down on the couch running his fingers through his hair. He looked up at the ceiling,

"Well this is just great."

_**Reviews make my day! =D**_


	7. Chapter 7

_**I know. It's been a month when I said it would only be two weeks. School is kicking me in the ass and I will use the birthday card and say that last week was my birthday =) As my present to you guys, I'm holding off on Snapshots last chapter to right the next one for this. Normally I rotate but I know how much you guys need your updates! Anyways happy reading! =) **_

Derek had sat in the living for thirty minutes waiting for Meredith to return. He knew she wouldn't be back for awhile. It was Meredith and when things got tough she ran to a dark and twisty place. That was her way of dealing with it. He stood up and walked towards the back of the apartment. He raised his hand and knocked on the door.

"Go away." shouted Meaghan.

"Meaghan open the door." said Derek as he knocked again. "Whether you like it or not we need to talk right now."

"I'm not talking to you or her." answered Meaghan sharply. "And especially not you, I don't know you."

"Meaghan open the right now." demanded Derek, without raising his voice. He listened as he heard silence on the other side. "Fine Meaghan you want me to un-screw the door off it's hinges I will. I'll even pick the lock, I'll…." said Derek as the door whirled open and there stood Meaghan.

"They're you saw me? Happy?" asked Meaghan with sarcasm. "Now go away." said Meaghan as she slammed the door in Derek's face.

Derek sighed as he retreated to the living room giving up for the time being. He was always the one that was in control of a situation. In an OR he was unstoppable, he could practically locate and aneurysm with his eyes closed and his hands tied. But being a father he was completely unfamiliar with. It was foreign territory. Clearly he had a lot to learn.

* * *

Meredith sat on the park bench as the Seattle rain pounded down onto her. Her daughter had just compared her to Ellis Grey. Ellis Grey. The one woman she vowed she would never be. Her mind flowed back to the day Meaghan was born. During her entire pregnancy and up until the, moment her daughter was born, she could hear her mother's voice inside her head scrutinizing her. _"You'll never be a good mother Meredith." "You can't be extraordinary with a child."_ Maybe this was one time in her whole life that she should have listened to her mother.

_Meredith felt herself relax as her abdomen un-tensed from the previous contraction. She propped herself upright more by leaning against the stack of pillows. She gave Lexie who was hovering by her side a weak smile. _

"_Do you need ice-chips or a washcloth?" asked Lexie for about the thousandth time that hour._

"_I'm fine Lex I swear, I'll let you know if I need anything." said Meredith. "I can' thank you guys enough for staying." said Meredith sincerely._

"_I'm your sister." said Lexie. "It's what sisters do. But we do it because we care." said Lexie as her eyes pooled slightly with tears._

"_No don' you go crying on me." said Meredith with a laugh, as she fought back tears. She squeezed Lexie's hand gently, in a comforting way._

"_I leave for a few minutes and you two have the water works going?" joked Mark as he poked his head inside the room._

"_Where did you go? You were gone for almost an hour." questioned Lexie._

"_I had to pick someone up from the airport." said Mark with a grin._

"_Cristina?" questioned Meredith, as another contraction hit her and she bent over in pain. Lexie extended her hand for support, which Meredith gratefully accepted. _

"_Well…no. Turns out the next flight out wasn't until an hour later. She should be arriving within the next hour to hour and a half. But I got the next best thing. I got the best OB-GYN on the west and east coast." said Mark._

_Meredith's eye's shot up at Mark like daggers, mid-contraction. There was only one doctor as world renown as he was talking about. _

"_Mark you didn't." said Meredith through the pain she was currently in,_

_And low and behold the one and only Addison Forbes Montgomery walked in. Her high heels clicking away on the tile. She smiled as brightly as she could at Meredith, as Mark smirked at his own plan._ _Lexie eyes widened at the surprise._

"_Look who was in New York and just hopped on a private plane and darted right over." said Mark with enthusiasm._

_Meredith let out a sigh, in relief that her current contraction was over, and in frustration realizing that this was going to be an even longer day and a doubly awkward process._

* * *

"_I hate your boyfriend right now." said Meredith as she sucked on an ice-cube to prevent her lips and mouth from getting dry._

"_I'm not too fond of him either at the moment. I mean he called his ex….whatever without even telling me or asking what I thought." said Lexie._

_Addison knocked on the door as she tucked her red bob behind her ears. She smiled as she walked in, now in scrubs and a hospital lab coat. _

"_How's everything going?" questioned Addison as she flipped open her chart. "Well your contractions are closer than they were the last time I looked at your chart. I'm...um...going to need to examine you." said Addison as she took her glasses off._

"_I'm just going to step outside and find Mark." said Lexie sensing the awkwardness in the air. She pointed to the door and squeezed Meredith's hand in reassurance, Meredith pleading with her eyes for her not to leave._

"_Alright.' said Addison as Lexie left. She briskly walked over to the sink and quickly washed her hands. She slipped on a pair of gloves as she came and sat at the edge of Meredith's bed._

_Meredith sat with an almost horrified look on her face as she realized that she was actually going to examine her. She pulled her knees tightly together to prevent further movement of any sort._

_Addison sensed the younger woman's apprehension and slipped off her gloves for a moment. "I know this is not how you wanted things to go. I'm probably the last person you want in this room right now." said Addison with a nervous laugh. _

"_It's not you." said Meredith as she felt another contraction start to build. "It's the situation. The whole ex-boyfriend's ex-wife delivers the baby wasn't really in the plans today." said Meredith. "This whole thing wasn't planned period." she said as she gestured to her stomach._

_Addison smiled understandingly at Meredith. "I take it Derek doesn't know." she said as she slipped her gloves back on and Meredith allowed her legs to relax so she could be examined._

"_No. He doesn't. Or didn't. We've been trying to call and page him because… I really need him here to do this." as her voice shook slightly, partly due to the contraction and partly due to thoughts running through her head._

"_He'll call. I know he will." re-assured Addison with a small grin. She quickly finished the exam and discarded her gloves in the trashcan beside the bed. "He's a good man. He'll call."_

_Meredith nodded as she swiped eyes in frustration for even letting tears build up. Never had she been a crier, why did these hormones have to make her start now. _

"_So what's the verdict?" joked Meredith._

"_The verdict is that you're half-way there. You're almost at seven and a half and if I had to guess I'd say you'll be holding your baby within the next hour and a half." said Addison._

_Meredith nodded as she put her hand to her stomach, as she finally realized this baby wasn't going to stay inside her forever. It would soon be here and be a living, breathing thing that depended on her for everything._

"_So in order to for the two of us to get through this we need to agree no more awkwardness. Okay? It's like a normal delivery, except with an ex-wife and an ex-lover, a nervous sister and a manwhore." said Addison with a laugh._

_Meredith laughed but stop when she felt her contraction start. She thought Lexie had suddenly re-entered when she felt someone's hand engulf her own hand in support, but then realized it was Addison's. _

"_No more awkwardness."_

* * *

_Mark knocked on the door as he entered. He'd tried to stay out of the room as much as possible during this entire process. It sounded silly since he was a doctor, but this whole childbirth process made him extremely uncomfortable. God help him when he has to be in the delivery room when he has a child._

"_How're things moving along?" asked Mark as he walked over to stand at the opposite side of the bed, so that he stood next to Meredith and across from Lexie._

"_Things aren't moving. I've been at eight freaking centimeters for almost forty five minutes." said Meredith with sarcasm evident in her voice._

_Mark grinned at how even in situations like these Meredith had sarcasm. Lexie handed Meredith a rubber band as she pulled her hair into a pony-tail._

"_Cristina just landed so I'm going to go and pick her up from the airport. I'll be back in twenty minutes tops." said Mark as he jingled his car rental keys._

"_Maybe I should go." piped in Lexie. "I mean, you don't want to not have good service in case you know who calls. Besides the airport is only like 2 miles from here." said Lexie._

"_Alright." said Mark as he gave into her words. He tossed her the keys and quickly pecked her on the lips. "Be careful. And hurry back." he said as he mouthed the last part._

_Lexie nodded and side hugged Meredith promising her she'd be right back. Meredith nodded, for she was in the middle of a contraction. She then quickly left the room._

"_Well I guess it's just us dirty mistresses." joked Mark._

_Meredith shot him a look as her contraction ended and she popped an ice-cube in her mouth._

"_If I really was a dirty mistress would I seriously be in this spot right now?"_

* * *

"_What's going on?" asked Addison as she barged into Meredith's room after being paged numerous amounts of time by Mark._

"_She was saying she felt a lot of pressure and then two seconds later the baby's heart rate dropped and she said she had to push." rambled Mark._

"_Alright let me see what's going on." said Addison as she snapped on gloves quickly and sat at the side of the bed to examine Meredith. "Meredith you need to relax your legs so I can examine you."_

_Meredith shook her head no as she whimpered slightly as a powerful contraction took over. She gripped the sides of the bed so hard, her knuckles were turning white._

"_Meredith I need to see what's going on with the baby and if it's in danger or not." said Addison with a forceful yet calming voice._

_Meredith nodded through the pain as she un-bent her legs and let Addison examine her. Addison nodded and quickly stood up suddenly seeming in a hurry._

"_This baby is coming right now." said Addison as the nurse started pushing instruments around. "I need to get him or her out before the heart rate fluctuates again." said Addison as she quickly tied a scrub cab onto her head._

"_What?" asked Meredith in a nervous voice as her eyes widened slightly at what she had just been informed._

"_The baby's coming right now? It can't be Lexie and Cristina aren't back yet." said Mark._

"_Well than you'll stay here." answered Addison as she quickly broke down Meredith's bed._

"_Me?" asked Mark incredously fear evident in his voice. "I'm not supposed to be doing this job. I was supposed to be the driver and the phone caller." said Mark._

"_Mark." said Addison as she dragged him away from the bed so Meredith wouldn't hear. "She has no one here for her right now. And the person she wants here most doesn't even know she's about to give birth. So you will stay here with her." ordered Addison._

_Mark nodded knowing it was the right thing to do. He waked back over to the bed and bent down to eye level with Meredith who had tears rolling down her cheeks._

"_I'm not going anywhere Mere. I'm staying right here." said Mark as he took her hand._

"_I'm scared." whispered Meredith as more tears pooled in her green eyes and dripped out._

"_I know you are. I am too." admitted Mark as he gently wiped away her tears with his free thumb. "But we're gonna do this. Who needs Lexie and Cristina when you've got me?" joked Mark as he tried to lighten the mood._

_Meredith giggled slightly through her tears. She quickly brushed away any remaining evidence of tears on her face and turned to look at Mark._

"_I guess this will make a good story to tell. Two ex-mistresses and an ex-wife delivering a baby. We could be our own Thursday night soap."_

* * *

"_Good job Meredith." said Addison as the nurse annoyingly counted off ten seconds. "Alright head's out. Just relax while I suction out the nose." said Addison. "Alright go ahead and push past the shoulders."_

"_I can't." said Meredith as she started to cry. "I can't do it."_

"_Meredith yes you can, you've gotten this far I promise you, that you can do this." re-assured Addison._

_Meredith shook her head indicating it was not that, that was scaring her. "I can't be a mom. I'm not ready; I won't be good enough for this baby." said Meredith, completely losing control of the situation at hand, and was breathing raggedly, to the point of almost hyperventilating. _

"_Meredith." said Mark as he pushed her bangs that had slipped into her eyes, out of her face and tightened the grip on her hand. "I promise that you can do this. Out of anyone I know you're just about the strongest person I've ever met. If anyone can be a mom, it's you. And you won't be alone. You'll have me and Lexie. Cristina, Alex, Izzie, Arizona, Callie. All of these people that want the best for you and this baby." said Mark._

_Meredith sniffled and nodded as she closed her eyes and then indicated to Addison that she was ready again. She bore down as she grit her teeth together, and the suddenly felt the baby expel from her body._

"_It's a girl." said Addison as she held up the squawking pink infant, an evident smile forming under her mask. She then placed her onto Meredith's stomach as the nurse began to stimulate warmth, by rubbing the blanket over her._

"_Oh my god. Oh my god she's here." said Meredith as she cradled her arms around her slightly. She looked up at Mark as tears began to fall down her face in relief and happiness._

"_I know." said Mark with a grin. Although he would never admit it, his eyes were watering as he looked at his new niece. "She's beautiful." said Mark._

"_Okay time to cut the cord." said Addison as she looked up at Meredith._

"_You do it." said Meredith as she looked at Mark. She nodded towards the infant as she took over for the nurse and rubbed the blanket._

"_Me?" questioned Mark as he was handed a pair of scissors and told where to cut. His hands shook slightly as he did so. The nurse then took the baby over to the warmer to do precautionary tests._

"_She's beautiful Meredith." said Addison with a smile. "You did great." said Addison as she finished up the procedures that followed the birth._

"_Eight pounds." said the nurse as she swaddled the baby in a pink blanket. "Scored nine on her apgar tests." commented the nurse. _

"_She's smart already." said Meredith with slightly amusement in her voice._

"_Here you go mom." said the nurse as she handed the baby over to Meredith. Meredith eased her into her arms with such gentleness, it looked as though she'd been doing it for years._

"_Hi sweetie. Hi Meaghan." said Meredith as she ran her finger along the wailing newborn's cheek. As if on cue, sensing that her mother was now holding her Meaghan's cries began to stop. _

"_I love you so much." said Meaghan as she pressed a kiss to her forehead._

Meredith trudged through the doors of her apartment, hours later soaking wet. Derek's eyes looked up from where they were in a magazine and widened as he briskly walked over to her.

"Where the hell did you go? You were gone for hours." said Derek. He then noticed how drenched she was. "Meredith you're soaking wet and freezing." said Derek as he touched her arm and inwardly cringed. Her body was cold. So cold. It brought him back to that horrible moment when he was carrying her out of Elliot Bay. She was so cold it was almost numbing. He quickly snapped out of his thoughts and turned his attention back to her.

"I know I'm wet." snapped Meredith as she jerked away from Derek's touch. "I'm going to take a hot shower." said Meredith as she walked into the bathroom and quickly turned on the burning water.

She quickly removed her wet clothes and got into the boiling hot shower. She nearly screamed at how hot it was. But somehow it felt good. It was relieving her heart that was full of hurt and pain. She inhaled sharply as she felt tears cloud her vision. She willed herself not to cry, to not give into these emotions. But the dam broke. Her body was wracked with sobs in a mere couple of seconds.

Derek sat in the living room, feeling the steam from the bathroom. "_She has that on way too hot."_ thought Derek to himself. He then listened as the eerie silence that had previously filled the house, was then interrupted by a loud noise. At first it was muffled and not easy to recognize, but then Derek quickly recognized it as Meredith.

He waked over to the bathroom door and knocked. He waited a few seconds expecting to hear some kind of response, a yell or threat but heard nothing but Meredith. He felt his heart ache as he listened to her heart wrenching sobs.

Suddenly his instincts took over and he barreled into the bathroom. He waked over to the shower where Meredith was crouched down crying in the corner, her skin red from the heart of the water. He quickly turned the water off and turned towards Meredith and scooped her into his arms.

She hooked her arms around his neck as she continued to sob. He reached for the towel and quickly wrapped it around her now shivering body. He then pulled her close as she gripped onto his tee-shirt. He soothingly ran his fingers through her wet waves, in attempts to calm her down. She laid her head on his shoulder, like a small child would as she took rapid breaths as her tears continued to flow.

"Shh." comforted Derek as her sobs began to turn into tears. "You're alright now Mere. It's okay. I'm right here."

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	8. Chapter 8

_**Well hello there =) Surprised to see me? Well I did promise another update didn't I? Thank you all for the reviews and belated birthday wishes! I completely agree that what Meaghan said to Meredith hurt her in ways she couldn't even imagine. Alright so I won't bore you anymore with my rambling! Happy reading =)**_

As Meredith's cries slowly succumbed into sniffles and hiccups, Derek stood up with her in his arms, and carried her into her room. Compared to her room in her mother's house, this room looked like a closet. There was barely much room to walk around and only one small closet. Derek didn't understand why Meredith chose a place like this to live in. It's not like she was barely making money and this was the best she could do. Before coming back to Seattle, Meredith had been one of the best neurosurgeons on the East Coast.

"Mere, I'm going to step outside while you change into pajamas." said Derek as he set her down gently on the bed in a sitting position. Meredith didn't even acknowledge his question.

He quietly stepped out and shut the door behind him. He glanced at the clock to see it was approaching almost eleven o'clock at night. She had been gone for almost six hours in the rain. She'd be lucky if she didn't have pneumonia tomorrow. He walked to the edge of the hall and softly knocked on Meaghan's door. He was surprised when the door was unlocked and he was able to turn it with ease. He peered into the dark room to see Meaghan sound asleep in her bed. He quietly crept back out and made his way back to Meredith's room.

"Mere?" questioned Derek as he slowly opened the door. He looked in to see her in the exact spot he had left her in. She was staring straight ahead, not making the slightest attempt to move. "Mere I'm going to get you changed, okay?" said Derek as he pulled open a drawer and took out her ratty Dartmouth long sleeved shirt, a pair of yoga pants, a bra and panties.

He walked over to her, and she dropped the towel slightly. Normally under different circumstances this would be a turn on, but not today. He struggled to put her bra on. He had never had problems taking these off, but putting it on seemed completely different. When he finally succeeded in hooking it, he then quickly slipped on her panties followed in suit by her pants. He smiled softly at her at her as he slipped her shirt on. She barely acknowledged him, her eyes giving him a hollow blank look.

He carefully pulled down the blankets, as he prepared to tuck her in for the night. He slowly moved her body under the blankets as he pulled them up and wrapped them around her shivering body.

"Good night Mere." said Derek as he leaned in and kissed her forehead gently. Just as he was pulling away, he felt a tug on his shirt.

"Stay." whispered Meredith, uttering her first words since her breakdown. "Stay with me." said Meredith as she gripped his shirt tighter, willing him not to go.

Derek sighed as he looked at her. He knew he shouldn't. But after the night she had just had, and the way she was currently looking at him, it was making it harder and harder to say no. He nodded as she peeled the blankets forward and he crawled in behind her.

Her body settled into his, perfectly fitting the way it always had. The way their bodies fit together was like a second nature. His head found its way back into its old spot on her shoulder. He gently rubbed her back soothingly, encouraging her to sleep.

"Sleep Mere." murmured Derek as he watched her eyes droop and her body finally succumb to the tiredness she had been fighting. Her breathing became even signaling she was finally asleep.

"I love you." whispered Derek into the darkness, knowing she wouldn't hear him. He then settled against her, as the exhaustion from the evening began taking a toll on him.

But as his eyes shut, he could have sworn he heard a response to his small proclamation. In fact he was almost positive he heard.

"_I love you too."_

* * *

Meredith's eyes blinked sleepily as she looked around the softly light room. She stretched slightly as she looked over at the clock, seeing that it was only seven o'clock in the morning. She wrinkled her nose as she smelt something come wafting in through under her door. Her expression then changed as she realized who was making breakfast. Who was in the apartment this early. Who had stayed the night. Who had slept in _her_ bed.

The pounding headache that been there since yesterday tripled. She cursed herself for even asking him to stay last night. _"What the hell were you thinking?"_ she asked to herself as she pulled on her bathrobe and padded her way into the kitchen.

Derek was busily whisking away at eggs in a bowl. She smiled slightly as she looked at the small kitchen table and how it was already set. She thought back to if she had never left. Would they be in their dream house by now? Instead of just having Meaghan would they have four other chatty perfect haired kids running around?

Derek looked up when he heard her enter. "Hey." said Derek softly as he poured the mixture into a frying pan on the stove. He gave it a quick toss and then walked over to Meredith. "How're you feeling?" asked Derek

"Embarrassed." said Meredith with a small smile. "Stupid. Idiotic. Those three words pretty much sum it up." said Meredith.

"Mere…" started Derek.

"I know. I shouldn't feel like that because you can't bottle emotions and expect them to not come out sooner or later. I was delusional though, I mean I asked you to stay and sleep with me." said Meredith.

"_But I wanted to stay. I wanted to hold you and take care of you." thought Derek._ "Meredith honestly I didn't mind. I wanted to keep an eye on you and Meaghan last night. I'm also staying today." said Derek as he went and turned the eggs.

"What?" questioned Meredith. "No you're not. Meghan has school and I have work. No one will be home."

"You will be. And I'm staying to take care of you. Because whether you admit or not you don't feel well. Emotionally and physically. So you're taking a day off." said Derek as he took the toast out from the toaster.

"Derek really I'm fine." said Meredith. "I have a lot of scheduled surgeries today. Patients need me. I have responsibilities."

"Today you're the patient. Someone else will take care of them." said Derek as he turned around and walked over and handed her a glass of orange juice and an aspirin. "Drink this and take that for your headache." said Derek.

Meredith looked at him confused. "How did you know I had a headache? I never said anything." said Meredith softly.

"You always moan in your sleep and scrunch your nose when you have one." said Derek as he handed her the now ready eggs.

Meredith was at a loss of words for what he had just said. He truly knew her better than she knew herself. She smiled at him as she took a bite of eggs. Maybe it wasn't so bad to be taken of sometimes.

* * *

Meredith giggled slightly as she sipped on the last of her orange juice, as Derek finished telling a story. Their heads both turned as they heard footsteps enter the kitchen.

"You're still here?" questioned Meaghan with an annoyed tone. She threw her backpack at one of the empty chairs and went to find a glass for a glass of milk.

"I'm still here." said Derek as he handed her a plate of eggs.

Meaghan looked down at the breakfast food and then shoved it back in his direction. "I don't want breakfast. I'm not hungry."

"Meaghan sit down and eat. Derek was nice enough to make breakfast so eat it." said Meredith.

"I'm not hungry." said Meaghan. "And when did you come back?" questioned Meaghan towards her mother. "You were gone for hours. What'd you do go out and drink?" said Meaghan with a smirk.

Meredith opened her mouth to speak and nothing came out but a sigh. She just shook her head at her daughter's behavior. What had happened to her near perfect daughter?

"Nothing to say?" questioned Meaghan as she took a sip of the milk she was holding in her hands. "Why don't you go wallow yourself in more pity? Drink a keg for all I care." said Meaghan as she turned to leave.

"That's it." said Derek as he turned around from where he was putting the dishes in the sink. "Sit." ordered Derek.

"What?" questioned Meaghan as her face scrunched in confusion. "No I have to get to school."

"Sit!" ordered Derek in a louder tone. Meaghan jumped slightly at the loudness of his voice and reluctantly sat down. Meredith nodded encouraging Derek that he was doing the right thing.

"I'm done with this. And your mother is done with this behavior. You don't get to go around and say things like you have been. So as of right now your behavior is changing." said Derek.

"Says who?" answered back Meaghan.

"Says me. Your dad. Because whether you like it or not I am your dad. So knock it off." said Derek as he turned back to what he was doing.

"Or what?" questioned Meaghan in a sassy tone.

Derek whirled around hearing the remark. "Give me your phone." said Derek as he extended his hand.

"What?" questioned Meaghan. "No!"

"Give it me right now." ordered Derek. Meaghan sighed dramatically as she fished around in her bag before handing Derek the cell phone. "Go to school and come straight home. That is what you'll be doing today and for the next week. You're grounded." said Derek.

"You can't ground me!" shouted Meaghan.

"Yes he can. And he just did. End of story." said Meredith matching the obnoxious smirk that Meaghan had been wearing. "What we say goes."

Meaghan held a stare with the two of them for thirty seconds before she then pounced slightly stifling a scream and then turned and left the apartment, closing the door with loud slam.

"I'm impressed." said Meredith. "You handled that really well. Like a dad." said Meredith a grin.

"Maybe I'm getting better at this." said Derek with a laugh as he cleared the table. "But you helped too. We make a pretty good team."

Meredith's heart fluttered at the word _team. _She tried to push the feelings that she had been feeling since she returned further and further back into her head, trying to make them non-existent. But how could she when he was so god damn perfect? _"Stop it Meredith"_ as Meredith inwardly scolded herself.

She knew damage had been done already. She had said things she wasn't supposed to say and she knew he knew what she said. This was a problem. A real problem.

Meredith Grey was falling for Derek Shepherd all over again.

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